CAREFULLY LAID PLANS

In my early adulthood, I was a careful planner. I would think ahead to the next thing in my life and then I would ask myself, What is every step I need to take to get me from here to over there?

Most times, when I did this sort of planning, I imagined roadblocks and then carefully made plans to avoid the roadblocks. Then, I re-engineered the route once again being careful to steer clear of anything that I saw as a problem.

And my biggest problem?

Fear.

I rarely took action because I was excited or over-joyed. Instead I took action because I thought I was supposed to. I thought I was supposed to go to college. I thought I was supposed to get good grades. I thought I was supposed to get a good job.

All those supposed tos?

They suck the fun out of life.

Now that I am older and wiser, I rarely take action because of a supposed to. Instead, I try to frame every action I take as a want to.

Here is how that sounds.

I want to get paid so I am showing up for work today.

I want to do more writing so I am taking today off.

I want to get outside so I am leaving this party and doing my own thing.

That’s how I roll now. And the difference in my energy is so astonishing that I thought I would share how you could take all your power back by changing how you talk. And how you think.

Let’s face it. Most of us have thoughts running around that sound like this.

I should attend that event even though I don’t really want to.

I should be nicer to Bob as he seems to be down in the dumps.

I should do more exercise as everyone says its good for you.

Sound familiar?

If this is how you talk or think, then you are likely exhausted. If this is how you run your life, then you are likely feeling that you have lost your spark. If this is what you allow in your head, then you are likely listening to others, but not to yourself.

Here is what my soul sounds like.

Let’s do something fun.

Let’s write a new essay and make it all about your little transformations.

Let’s be proactive and start saying I want more often.

Learning to say I want is the skill of a lifetime. And here is what I mean. Life takes off when you start saying I want. And mean it.

If you could make one change to your life to achieve outsized results, here is my advice. Start saying I want in every situation you are in.

I want this meeting to end quickly.

I want her to talk less.

I want to cruise to success taking the easy route.

Most of us are so out of touch with our wants that we actually think we have no wants. Who, me? I’m fine. I’ll just order a salad.

Those are the words of a person who has stopped saying I want.

Wants are the language of your soul. Wants are the fuel that makes life move forward. Wants are the calling card of the divine, leaving your breadcrumbs on a trail to your best path.

If you are mired in supposed tos, shoulds, or musts, then you stand to gain the most from this one little switch. Start saying I want and watch your power grow.

And as to my planning for my goals? I gave that up years ago. I see my soul as carefully crafting a plan for me based on every want I toss over to her. My work? Just show up and love what is and follow my wants.

Where are you depleting your power by using words that suggest someone else is in charge of you? Where can you identify a want and own it? Where can you let your spirit take the reins and show you the path toward what you want?